Meeting new people in a sacred space. Here’s how it goes down.
I’m alone. I’m reflecting on what I am missing. I’m reaching into the void - clutching at passersby on chatroulette and omeegl. Met some flirts, met some friends, seen a lot of genitals, seen some performance art. Not on the whole a negative experience but I feel, I know, I am looking for something else I am missing. Something - touch. Actual people.
And I remember reading about some basic touch workshops that were run in my neck of the woods a few months back, in the community rag. Before it was relevant to me, before I was truly technically alone. But it must have struck a chord… Because I remember that I saw it - consenting touch - “snuggle parties” or “cuddle parties” or some such thing. So I am rooting through the recycling for the newspaper and I find it. Truth be told it must have been an un-dealt-with-pile-of-crap to be still lying around so… Anyway…
There it is. It happened about a week ago. But there are phone numbers and email addresses for the person organising it. So I take a big deep breath and I email them. So trepidation. Much shy.
And they reply - this lovely (sounding) lady says - hey - too bad, you just missed one and we’re not doing again for a month or three. Where did you hear about this and why do you think it would be right for you? And I say so - openly, honestly, mildly cathartically, to be honest.
And to my surprise and relief, this honesty, this level of contact, this potential overshare, is OK. Is affirmed. I was so primed for rejection (a couple nights on chatroulette will do that for you) that this was in and of itself just overwhemingly *good*. You can tell people where you are coming from and what you are about and they don’t go “ew” they go “ah… and let’s discuss more”. People fucking rule. And they answer emails - like there is anything worse than sending that message and waiting? Well this *stranger* didn’t make me wait. She replied. It’s genius. Everyone should do this.
So after some back and forth where I am sure she is at least trying to make sure I am not a crazy person and I am both trying to not come across like a desperate crazy person and make sure she is not a crazy person (and at least partly not caring if she turned out to be) she says: well… We won’t be running another snuggle party for at least a month. But we *are* running a sacred sensual massage group this weekend - it is invitation only but if you would like to join us I will invite you.
My brain explodes.
And then I google what the hell she is talking about.
And then it explodes some more. And luckily they can’t hear the break in my voice as I compose a reply and try-not-to-send-it-too-soon-and well anyway.
To make a long story long. I go.
And that’s the next thing.